Why Do Women Get Postnatal Depression and How to Overcome It

The period after childbirth is often described as joyful—but it can also bring emotional overwhelm that many don’t expect. 

While it’s common to feel a little tearful or irritable in the early days (known as the “baby blues”), postnatal depression (PND) is something different. It runs deeper, lasts longer, and needs more than just time to pass.

PND affects a significant number of women, often quietly and gradually. It’s not a sign of weakness, and it certainly doesn’t mean you’re failing as a mother. It means your mind and body are asking for support.

The good news is that help is available, and with the right guidance, recovery is possible. 

What is Postnatal Depression?

Postnatal depression is a mood disorder that can develop after childbirth. It’s more than feeling overwhelmed or tired—it’s a persistent emotional and mental strain that affects how you feel, function, and connect with your baby and those around you.

It’s often confused with the baby blues, which are short-term mood shifts that usually resolve within the first two weeks. Postnatal depression, on the other hand, lasts longer and may begin slowly—sometimes weeks or even months after birth—making it harder to recognize at first.

Many mothers hesitate to speak up because they worry they’ll be judged or seen as incapable. But experiencing postnatal depression doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. It means your mind and body are navigating a major transition—and that support is not only valid but necessary.

Who is Most at Risk for PND?

Postnatal depression doesn’t always come with clear warning signs, but certain factors can increase the likelihood of developing it.

For instance, mothers who have previously experienced depression or other mental health challenges may be more vulnerable, especially if those issues were left untreated or resurfaced during pregnancy.

Feeling isolated, unsupported, or overwhelmed by the demands of caregiving can also quickly wear someone down—especially if they’re also dealing with relationship tension or financial stress.

It’s important to know that postnatal depression isn’t limited to first-time mothers. Even if your earlier postpartum experiences felt smooth, a different set of circumstances this time—such as complications in pregnancy, difficulty bonding, or exhaustion from juggling multiple children—can shift your emotional footing.

If you fall into any of these categories, it doesn't mean postnatal depression will definitely occur—but it does mean it’s worth paying closer attention to how you’re coping and feeling as the weeks go by.

When Does Postnatal Depression Usually Start?

Postnatal depression doesn’t always occur immediately after birth. While some mothers may notice symptoms in the first few weeks, others find that it begins months later—sometimes as late as the baby’s first birthday. 

In some cases, depressive symptoms may already be present during pregnancy and continue into the postpartum period. 

Because the timeline varies for every mother, it’s important to check in with yourself regularly—not just physically, but emotionally. Whether it starts early or later on, postnatal depression deserves attention, not delay. 

Why Does Postnatal Depression Happen?

Postnatal depression rarely stems from a single cause. It’s often the result of a combination of emotional, physical, and situational pressures that build up during a time of intense change. Even mothers who felt steady and well-supported in a previous postpartum season can find themselves struggling the next time around.

Some common contributing factors include a past history of depression or anxiety, limited support from partners or family, and difficult birth experiences. Health complications—either for the baby or mother—can also play a role, especially when paired with sleep deprivation or feeding challenges.

What makes things harder is that many of these stressors overlap. For instance, a tough recovery combined with breastfeeding struggles and financial stress can quietly chip away at emotional resilience.

Recognising the Signs of Postnatal Depression

The signs of postnatal depression can look different for every mother—and sometimes they show up gradually. You might notice a persistent low mood, heightened anxiety, or irritability that feels hard to shake. Fatigue that doesn’t improve with rest, difficulty sleeping even when your baby is settled, or losing interest in things you used to enjoy are also common signals.

Other symptoms include feeling disconnected, struggling with appetite, and carrying a sense of guilt or hopelessness. Some mothers may even find themselves feeling indifferent or negative toward their baby, which can be deeply distressing and confusing.

It’s important to remember: having a few tough days is normal—but if these feelings persist most days and don’t seem to lift, it could be time to take a closer look.

The Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS) is a useful starting point for self-reflection. But a proper diagnosis and support plan should always come from a healthcare provider. 

How to Address Postnatal Depression

There’s no single approach to treating postnatal depression—what works for one person may look very different for another. The most important thing is finding a path that feels safe, supportive, and sustainable for you.

Many women benefit from psychological therapies like counseling or cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), especially when symptoms are mild to moderate. These sessions provide a space to process difficult thoughts, learn coping strategies, and rebuild emotional balance.

In more severe cases, medication may be considered alongside therapy. If you’re breastfeeding, your doctor can discuss options that are compatible with your needs. The decision to take medication is personal, and it should always be made with clear guidance and understanding of potential side effects.

Self-Care Tips: How to Help Yourself Through PND

While professional support is essential, there are small, consistent actions that can help you start managing postnatal depression day by day. These steps may not solve everything, but they can create space for relief and recovery.

First, prioritize rest—even if it means sleeping in short stretches when your baby naps. Accepting help, especially during the night, can make a real difference to how you cope emotionally.

Make sure you’re eating regularly. Skipping meals or running on empty can worsen fatigue and irritability. Keeping snacks or easy-to-prepare meals on hand can help when energy is low.

Even light movement, like walking around your block or stretching indoors, can lift your mood and release tension. And don’t underestimate the power of connection. Talking to other mums or joining a support group can break the isolation and remind you that you’re not going through this alone.

These small adjustments, when done regularly, support your healing—not as a quick fix, but as part of a larger plan to help you feel more grounded and cared for.

When to Seek Professional Help

If you’ve been feeling low for more than a couple of weeks, or if your symptoms are starting to affect your ability to function day to day, it’s time to reach out. Postnatal depression can deepen when left unaddressed, and waiting for it to pass on its own often adds to the strain.

Some signs need immediate attention—especially if you’re experiencing thoughts of self-harm or harming your baby. These moments are not reflections of who you are, but signals that your mind and body are under immense pressure and need care.

Seeking help from a doctor, therapist, or mental health professional isn’t a failure. It’s a step toward regaining control and feeling supported. You don’t need to have all the answers before you speak up—you just need to take that first step. 

You Are Not Alone

Postnatal depression is more common than most people realize—and far less talked about than it should be. If you’re struggling, please know that this doesn’t reflect your worth or your ability to parent. It reflects how much you’re carrying.

There is nothing shameful about needing support. In fact, seeking help is one of the strongest, most loving things you can do for both yourself and your baby. Because when you feel more stable and supported, everything else becomes a little easier to manage.

That’s exactly why I offer personalized postnatal counseling right here in Singapore. Through one-on-one sessions and a dedicated six-week coaching program, I guide new mothers in making space for their emotions, restoring mental clarity, and reclaiming the joy in motherhood.

You don’t have to push through this on your own. Let’s take the next step together—towards a version of motherhood where you feel seen, supported, and fulfilled. 

Reach out to explore how we can start that journey.